Non-Negotiables

Along the beaten path I have found a few things that make me feel like a rags to riches story. I call these things my non-negotiables. They make me feel like royalty. Like a quick trip to Italy just because I was craving fresh pasta and a glass of Barolo royalty. Like sunning at a summer home in the Hamptons royalty. Like anything I could ever want is at my fingertips royalty.

Although, my non-negotiables are within my budget and aren’t necessarily pricey. They are, however, worth every penny spent because they make me feel like a million bucks. As I live life my list grows. And while my list may seem feminine, having non-negotiables isn’t just for the ladies. The gents should consider having a list of their own. Here are my non-negotiables, feel free to try them on for size and keep what fits.

1. An amazing coffee maker. We have a Moccamaster. It is the priciest of my non negotiables, but it is an investment and the best home drip coffee maker on the planet, hands down. Go one step further and make your grounds fresh each morning from perfectly roasted beans and its a whole new experience. Drinking coffee is no longer about your morning dose of caffeine, but it becomes a ritual to be enjoyed.
2. Candles. And not just your average Hawaiian Breeze Glade candle found with the cleaning supplies at Target (although this can get you by in a pinch), but long burning, extravagantly fragranced candles. My absolute favorite fragrance is tobacco. It’s rich and complex. It makes any room automatically feel luxurious, even if it is artless with 1980s linoleum.
3. A lavish bar of soap. This is typically reserved for the winter months when I can take long, piping hot baths. No bubbles, just a lovely bar of soap. Dove or Ivory won’t cut it here. It needs to be triple milled from France, Portugal, Spain or Italy, made with vegetable, olive, coconut and palm oils and lightly scented. Jasmin, olive, fig and almond are a few of my favorites. The best bars are Pre de Provence.
4. Perrier for summer. Or any sparkling mineral water. But it has to be in a glass bottle. And I drink it with a straw. This isn’t the only water I drink, but it is the only water I like cold. So it is perfectly refreshing for a summer afternoon. When summer turns to winter I trade my refreshing beverage for a warmer one. The kind that warms your soul, hot green or licorice tea.
5. The gym. It took me years to find a gym routine that didn’t make me wish I was headed to a bikini wax appointment instead. Alas, I found CrossFit and no longer dreaded every moment spent on fitness. It changed the way I looked and how I felt. Now my sweat sessions are rarely sacrificed. I also enjoy Bikram yoga, walking my dogs and even just a 15 minute stretch session on my back patio.
6. Lip balm, mascara & self confidence. The three things I never leave the house without. And perhaps my phone.
7. Books. I have made it a rule to power down an hour before bed. No phone, dim lights and R&R. Each night I read. A real paper book. No kindle or iPad. Some things should be enjoyed old school style and this is one of them. I usually read about 3-4 books a month. Preferably non-fiction, but occasionally there is a great fiction book that I can’t put down.
8. A signature scent. Spring/summer = Beach by Bobby Brown, fall/winter = Kiehl’s Vanilla & Cedarwood Aromatic Blend. Love both and miss the other when the season changes.
9. Skin care. SPF 45 for my face everyday. Oh and daily and nightly moisturizer and eye cream. Your face tells the story of your life without saying a word. I would prefer the story being told not include the words tired, old, saggy, sad or dull. I’d much rather be dewy, glowing, happy, fresh and young.
10. Flowers. There is something magical about having fresh flowers in your home all year long. I spend maybe 10 bucks a week at most and there is no need for a florist. Trader Joe’s has a beautiful selection. I keep them in the front entrance on a console table, a single stem on my nightstand and a small bunch as a centerpiece on my dining table. And when I have house guests, I add flowers to their nightstand as well. Just because flowers make me smile.

Each of my non-negotiables has become a ritual. From my morning coffee to a hot bath on a cold night to my morning skin care routine and nightly “power down” mode. All done surrounded by flowers and aromatics. Non-negotiables are about having those few things that make life that much more enjoyable.

Think about your non-negotiables and if you don’t have any may I strongly recommend finding a few. You don’t need to spend millions to feel like your worth millions. Trust me.